Do you have any coping mechanisms for when you feel fat and ugly? What do you do to deal? Work out? Eat less? Meditate? How do you handle it? I feel like a blimp and no amount of eating right or exercising is helping me.
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Some may label it sappy, pop-psychology, but I think there is at least a kernel of truth in the final lines from Max Ehrmann’s prose-poem "Desiderata":
"You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy."
By the way, I do keep a regular meditation practice and recommend it to anyone interested.
Namaste’,
A.
p.s. Also, I strongly recommend keeping up regular exercise; there are a lot of other life-long benefits even if it does not seem to be delivering a centerfold-quality figure.
I listen to Everybody Hurts by REM and pet my Pet Rock.
um i never feel like that
Cover your mirrors and don’t get on the scales.
I rub my head and wish for a miracle.
eat more. obv.
sex duh
You need to have a good dump, does wonders for the body and mind
There’s a fat girl inside me that won’t stop complaining. I can usually shut her up with a cookie.
i look at a picture of ugly scary looking anorexics. im not fat, but im not skinny…so i just go and eat sensibly. I aint ever wanna look like a crackwhore anorexic. bad hair,teeth,skin, bones sticking out everywhere…so goss.
I never feel like that. I’m happy being average, and i couldn’t care less what people think…
Uhh i dont know……Im not fat or ugly
I hear ya sista!
No I wish I did. I need to get motivated but I can’t. Maybe seeing that I am not the only one having a problem might help me out some. Good luck too!
Go and buy something that fits nicely and looks good. It’ll help you feel better. But aside from that, you’ve gotta be doing something wrong. Apparently, you’re still taking in more calories than you’re burning. That is the key. You’ve GOT to burn more than you’re taking in. Up the exercise and really get a handle on what you’re eating. You CAN’T NOT lose weight!
I eat healthily and pamper myself. I try and find my good aspects and just think about them. Walk instead of taking transport, car or lift. Drink 2 liters of water a day. Feel good about yourself by feeling confident. A day of relaxing also really helps.
Never feel like that, i’m right nice
If your already excercising and dieting and still not feeling good about yourself, maybe the problem isnt a physical one but a psychological one. I’d start looking at things that are going on around you. Is there any stresses around you? Do you experience bullying at all? stuff like that.
i think of the women who judge me for being broke then say screw it. i have a cousin who is bullemic and know what this crap does to women. please see your school counselor and start following the four food groups. talk to your nurse about a healthy and SAFE work out program. if you have access to a pool JUMP IN. there is NO better excersise than swimming!:-) i once dropped 25 pounds in a three week scout trip from the constant hiking and swimmng;
Cry UMM!
I don’t own a scale. I love doing yoga because it helps me relax and I feel like I’m working out without being on display in a gym. I would put on the cutest or sexiest outfit you have, look in the mirror and say "damn, I look good"
I used to think that i was fat and ugly until i met someone that totaly change my mind and now i thing i’m not as bad as some people out there. I may be still fat but that’s my life and not theirs and if they don’t like it they don’t have to look at me, simple as that.
what do i do? ignore the mirror and the voices in my head? but seriously those are some good ideas eat less fat, workout, and or lipo and a makeover.
yah that’s low self esteem….you need to work on your self esteem..there is no coping mechanism in the world that will fix that…infact, that your first problem right there…you want to find a temporary fix for a very large problem….well in the self esteem category there’s no amount of duck tape that will fix that problem….it’s will take alot of hard work on your part and new material to fix it (so to speak) accomplish a goal of yours or something..or seek professional help.
Put on some music and work out, go for a walk, eat healthier, try to pamper myself more!! All those make me fill better when I fill like that! Good Luck with everything.
I usually put on sweats so I can be comfy and rent a movie or read a book. Even though I’m feeling fat I eat my favorite foods and just hang around the house. The next morning things are back to normal.
Stop watching all of the stupid talk shows. Notice they will talk about weight or some other insecurity people have and right when they cut to commercial it is some stupid weight loss pill or some other pill diet or fad on how to look like a super model or feel like a Hollywood star. It’s not just food that makes us look and feel bad, it is our mental diet as well. Open a book, or maybe take a walk and start a conversation with God.
There is nothing you can do for now about your body. Get your mind off of yourself and get busy doing other things such as a good house cleaning, crafts, buy a dance DVD and dance along with it (break dancing is fun), set your sights on a new life. Don’t cry about things you cannot fix at the moment.
Sorry never felt ugly even when I was fat. I have always had great self esteem and I never gave a hot damn about what anybody had to say about me. With that said you should rephrase your question, and ask yourself…"What can I do to boost my self esteem?" Some people are fat some people are skinny, it is the way of the world and we arent all meant to be pencil thin. Some men like round women and some like boney women. Trust me, there is someone for everyone!!
I get a haircut – that’s a few lbs. lost.
Workout use it as motivation! Its probably not helping you cause you might be doing everything wrong as far as eat and working out! Also people tend to workout for a month and expect everything to go away. It doesnt it takes months for things to start to shape up so you have to be dedicated to what your doing!
give myself a big pamper
hot bath, scrub, moisturiser
then good happy movie with some low fat icecream and a fat free milkshake
………or i buy myself something ive wanted for a while but avoid food
…………invite all my mates over with a bottle of wine (friends will always say the goods things about you)
hope i helped
down feel down!!
work out and eat six times a day with low portions. very little carbs for three days, followed by one high carb day. then again the same thing. makes me thin in 2 months…well not that thin. but i have to workout and do 30 min cardio in the morning
It is all in your mind!
If you believe that you are fat and ugly, you act that out and others pick at it.
You mentioned quite a few good things to do. Keep trying and praise yourself when you achieve any little. Little by little you will surely shed the weight.
By the way, who says being big is ugly, you can be big and still be beautiful.
Replace a meal in a day with just salad and enjoy being in your body. Once the mindset changes everything else falls in place.
Good luck!
You call your friends and tell them how your feeling and if they’re good friends they’ll make you feel better.
Or you could get yourself determined to change your habits, that can be very uplifting. For example, making a decision to work out on a daily basis(running loses weight best and fastest)
i do actually like to workout, but in your case you dont. so i know that when i feel like i dont want to workout, i will put on dancing music. i jump around and and move my hips for about 10-15 mins. then i take a 5 min break and do it again. i do that from anywhere to 45 mins to an hour. just moving around like that will actually burn calories. after doing that for a week or two, you may start to feel better and want to work out. their is also just taking a short walk for 15-30mins. dont think of it as exercising though. maybe take a friend and talk about your day or what is bothering you. when i start talking about my day i will get a little worked up and before i know it i am walking faster and time has flown by. try these few tips and maybe it will help. also drink water throughout the day and no type of sodas or caffinated drinks. that can help alot.
I buy shoes and get a hair cut. If I’m bloated then clothes don’t do me any good and if I feel ugly then looking at the same drab head in the mirror doesnt’ help. I buy shoes, get my haircut and belt out some Fergie in my livingroom. Makes me feel better from top to bottom…
The question is are you fat and ugly or do you just think you are? My ex wife was drop dead gorgeous with the face of a model and a body to match. She felt she was fat and ugly. Got to the gym and work your *** off and then engage in lots of sex.
Ooooooh. We call that an FFU Day (Feeling Fat and Ugly). Oh, yes. Having FFU days is a common occurrence in a house full of girls.
Every one deals with it in their own way. Me? I drink a LOT of water. It makes me pee a lot and I feel like I am losing weight just by peeing. You can even weigh yourself and see it happening.
One of my friends just gives up and watches Lifetime Movie Channel and eats chocolate ice cream.
One of my roommates goes for a run and tried to drag me along with her…. but I don’t run unless I am being chased by wolves.
I never felt this way… and not only because I never was fat and absolutely am not ugly
… I just love my self as I am, here is the psychological point… but there are few ways to help if someone is really fat… (as ugly no one is – there always will be someone who see you as perfect, just find this one). To eat less – helps day by day to put in your dish less and less food, little by little your stomach will ask less and less 
. Another way, is not so healthy, but I heard it really helps… when you are hungry drink a cup of coffee without sugar… plus a cigarette if you smoke… appetite will be zero. but you risk to die from cancer. choose 
What I would ask is there other things in your life that are having an effect on your self esteem at the moment. Are you being made to feel this way, is someone pulling you down and if it is this then you could look at that relationship and see how you need to change it. If not and you are depressed and it is internal, I would think it would be a good idea to go and get some help from someone you can trust, to talk about your feelings or even see your doctor.
Meditation is a great way of sorting out those negative feelings, it helps to relax you and gives you the ability to be compassionate with yourself and helps you stop judging yourself in a negative way.
Affirmations are really great to, they help to override the negative suggestions you give yourself unconsciously.
Creative Visualization is a book by Shakti Gwain that is a great help when we need to work on our self esteem.
I hope this helps x
I’ve never been stick thin IN MY LIFE. When I was younger I had a lot of problems accepting myself just because of what kids in school would say about me. As I went through high school and I matured, my personal perceptions of beauty changed. I’m a women’s size 10, but I can wear a small/medium top. I’m naturally curvaceous and for a while, absolutely hated it! When I start getting down on myself I try to do things that take the emphasis off of my weight. I paint and draw, knit, sew, etc. These are just my hobbies of choice, but do something totally unrelated to your body that you enjoy! (Shopping for jeans is almost NEVER a good idea when you’re feeling crappy…)
Chances are, if you focus so much on your diet and exercise schedule you’ll only make yourself more obsessed with what’s making you unhappy. As long as you’re not in danger of experiencing health problems due to your weight, RELAX! You’re beautiful and if you believe it, so will everyone else! The most beautiful women aren’t necessarily those that are 110 pounds, but those that can love themselves because of who they are!
Unfortunately, many women (and men) feel the same way as you do. It saddens me that so many people see themselves through a negative lense – and I am one of those people.
I have an eating disorder that I am in recovery from. I suffered for more than three quarters of my life and am just now beginning to understand that life does not have to be full of pain, fear, guilt, and shame. Whether or not you feel and act as severely as I did, there is hope.
I wish there was a magoc pill one could be prescribed or that eating well, exercising, or the like would help – but often the feelings we feel are not based in reality or are skewed by our own feelings and beliefs. And the only thing I know to help with that is to begin to change the way I think, my belief systems, and how I react to those thoughts, feelings, and beliefs.
There are many ways to combat such thinking, but all of them take time to take hold. Affirmations are incredibly helpful despite feeling somewhat hokey in the beginning. Talking to other people who feel the same or who you feel comfortable with can also help. Reading, learning more, and being willing to change your beliefs in small increments will also help – but, again, all of these things take time. In the moment you can use the tool of distraction to ride out the negative feelings and you can also help heal yourself through writing and art. Staring a health regime may also help you feel more confident and secure in your body. Sometimes just becoming healthier will help to negate bad feelings we all often have about ourselves. And studies prove that exercise releases endoprhins to help stabilize and boost moods.
But what is the most helpful? Acceptance. If you can accept yourself you will learn to love yourself – imperfections and all. Our flaws are what make us who we are. Our flaws are what make us interesting. Embrace them and learn to love and accept yourself for who you are both on the inside and the outside.
I know it is hard, but try to hang in there. Good for you for reaching out and being willing to ask for help. You can get through this…we all can…
JUST LOOK FOR SOMEONE WHO IS FATTER AND UGLYER AND FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF lol!
LOOK EVERYONE FEELS LIKE THAT AT ONE POINT IN OUR LIFES EVEN IF YOUR THIN, FAT, UGLY, PRETTY WHAT YOU DO IS THAT YOU JUST DEAL WITH IT, IT HAPPENS BUT THE NEXT DAY YOU FEEL GREAT LIKE ALWAYS LIKE I SAID WE ALL HAVE THOSE DAYS
Ice cream, exercise
Get with your friends and go out and have a good time like going shopping or movie night, girl talk, or make over night and about you feeling fat if you do get down to a smaller size its still not going to make you happy or stop feeling fat you need to start within you before you start on the outside. Non of that meditating help unless you learn how to control what you eat and exercising with a friend to push and work harder at your goal hope you get it right.
I bury myself in a project that I’ve been putting off (of which there are many, lol) or spend some time with people that need me. It helps to distract myself from what is bothering me and eventually I feel better.
Usually hard work of any kind can quell feelings of inadequacy or self-doubt. Hard work leads to motivation. Because if you can accomplish something(anything) — you’ll realize the power you possess and that can help turn your sad and negative energy around to do something positive for yourself.
Remember, one step at a time. Chin up!
Quit beating yourself up. You are your own worst critic. You have to realize that to someone out there you are beautiful even though you may not feel beautiful. At the very least, your parents think you are beautiful. Those who love you think you are beautiful. If you need assurance that you are beautiful, take a look at that new TV show where they take a woman who doesn’t think she is pretty and end up with her posing tastefully nude for a photograph. I think the show has a title something like "Do I Look Beautiful Naked?" During the show, she is taken and shown how to dress and how to apply her makeup, etc. in the end, she is photographed and she is absolutely beautiful. First, realize that just as you are, you are beautiful. Then if you want to change anything, go to a health club where they have qualified trainers and spend some time with a trainer. Get some exercise to tone up your body. Spend some time with someone who can help you pick out the most flattering clothing for you and get a cosmetologist to show you how to properly apply your makeup. With very little effort, you will find that you are really a beautiful woman and just hadn’t realized it yet.
One thing to keep in mind is something that a friend of mine told me one time. She was a very free spirit and was dancing up a storm in a crowded place. I asked her if being so free with her movements and even making some really bad moves didn’t embarrass her. Her reply was "I don’t know them, they don’t know me and in a little while I’ll be gone." She may not have been the absolutely most beautiful woman I had ever known but her confidence, her free spirit and her disregard for any bad thoughts anyone may have had about her made her one of the most beautiful women I have ever known.
Pizza and ice cream helps… And prozac… jk The gym is where I head to!
I used to feel that way, and finally, I said to myself, "This is how I look, and I’m going to have to learn to like myself for what I am. Just because I don’t look like a movie star doesn’t make me any less of a good person." Are you really fat to the point it’s affecting your health, or do you just see yourself as fat? If you’re obese, then exercise a little more and eat a little less. It’s the only thing that really works.